In For the Kill
by Mizuki Kuro-chan
Summary: Roxas isn't doing so well without his red head beside him, and Axel refuses to tell him where he was, but breaks down and eventually tells him. expecting to be pushed away, he gets a surprise. songfic-ish one shot. fluff if you squint a bit. please enjoy.


So, long time no updates, eh?

SO SORRY! I'm going to be moving so I don't have much time to do anything much right now, but I had to give you all this to try and make up for the VERY LATE updates that will be occurring.

This is a songfic, yes, but I recommend you listen to the song too, as it's incredible, and if you get a chance to play the game that song is advertising on TV, then go for it! It's awesome, and you'll love it, I'm sure.

www (dot) youtube ( dot) com/watch?v=tz6wMgS9C-o/2/RxNp8O-pgxc

so copy and past, but put in the . As it's supposed to be, you know the drill you guys!

ANYWAYS! If any of you are in toronto in the next while and want to meet up let me know, since I'll just be moving there, so I won't know ANYTHING! Except, I did ride the subway once, that was fascinating. ....^^ I'm a country dork tho, so big city is going to scare the crap out of me and I know I'll get lost a lot there too. Lol. I can only hope I'll learn where I'm going soon enough.

Anyways! Onwards!

Disclaimer-do not own. Not even a little bit. I am much displeased. Squenix owns KH, and La Roux owns the song.

* * *

Slow and stead footsteps sound out along the hallway as a small figure steps uncertainly down the large hallway they had all just fixed up the day before as a mission because Demyx couldn't contain his glee when Zexion found a small puppy in his rooms and brought it out to play.

Blue eyes came dangerously close to softening when they reached a door with a very intricate scrawl of letters across it.

-We can fight our desires

But when we start making fires-

Floury of Dancing Flames was written across in very vibrant shades of red and yellow and a lot of black, giving the blue eyed boy much pause to his step, reluctant to move past the door.

-We get ever so hot

Whether we like it or not-

But it doesn't give him any satisfaction to linger either, so he moves on.

He knows the door will be repainted and changed soon again, as the occupant has changing tastes in decor.

-They say we can love who we trust

But what is love without lust?-

Slowly moving his footsteps onwards, the boy recollects memories he'd gathered as a consequence for making friends with the room's occupant. Well, he reasoned, as much as they could be without hearts. They are heartless after all, just on a much grander scale.

-Two hearts with accurate devotions

And what are feelings without emotions?-

"Got it memorized?"

Startled, the boy turns around, but no one is there. It's all in his head. It always was. Sighing, he walked back to the door with the familiar scrawl on it, and turned the door knob. It wasn't locked. It never was. What was the point of locking your door if all the people who lived with you could just open a portal in anyways?

-I'm going in for the kill

I'm doing it for a thrill

Oh I'm hoping you'll understand

And not let go of my hand-

slowly creaking open, the door swung and the blue eyed boy sighed as the familiar musk of male scent and cigarettes assaulted his nose.

-I'm going in for the kill

I'm doing it for a thrill

Oh I'm hoping you'll understand

And not let go of my hand-

walking in a circle around the semi-familiar room, he thumbed through some notes and absently set them aside, as he moved on to drape his fingers across various trinkets splayed out across the average sized room.

He was worried. The fiery red haired man who occupied the room hadn't been back in weeks, and everyone but the Superior was getting worried about their sarcastic fun loving red head. And the blue eyed boy as well, for it was a little obvious he was pinning for the red head's presence.

-I hang my hopes out on the line

Will they be ready for you in time?

If you leave them out too long

They'll be withered by this song.-

Leaving the room to go to dinner with the rest of the crew not out on missions, closing the door gently he almost whimpered when the smell he had grown to know and be familiar with disappeared.

Whispers followed him as fellow organization members looked his way and saw the condition he was in.

There were big purple crescents under his dulled and listless blue eyes, mussed hair and clothes, and a distinct lack of attitude. Usually he prided himself on keeping very clean, and his sharp eyes were enough to send anyone an eat-shit-and-die glare, and scare the crap out of them.

Even though he was always glaring at the red head who was constantly on his mind, he could tolerate his way out there attitude and appearance because he had grown to semi-like having the big dork around. Hardly even pushing the food around on his plate anymore, he got up, and left, leaving the rest of the disaster hall occupants eating and discussing him at their leisure.

It was called the disaster hall now simply because of a small food fight. Well, alright, it wasn't that small, but if Axel hadn't thrown those lumpy potatoes at him- and he cut himself off here.

He decided to just stop thinking altogether, because thinking of the red head all the time was not good for him. Yet every thought, every memory pressured him to remember. Not even having the energy to summon a portal, the blue eyed boy trudged up the stairs, and walked into his room. Since he had smelled something off about his room, he stopped and looked around, but nothing looked too different.

Unless, of course, you counted the red head lounging in his desk chair looking like he completely belonged there.

-Full stops and exclamation marks

My words stumble before I start-

Stopping dead at the sight, the blue eyes widened perceptibly and a pale slim hand reached out. But, too afraid to trust it was not his memory, he dropped his hand. Too many of the organization members had caught him reaching for something or taking to someone who was never there. They didn't even bother to hide te whispers now, like they used to.

-How far can you send emotions?

Can this bridge cross the ocean?-

Deciding he wasn't going to do anything, Axel got up, and reached out for the blue eyed boy, and had almost touched him, but he hesitated when he saw a small flicker of fear and indecision in the blue eyes he couldn't tear himself away from.

The last thing he wanted to do was scare the younger. Instead he just mutely held his arms out, and smiled sadly as the younger boy slowly stepped forward to place his hand timidly and with the upmost uncertainty on his own hands.

-I'm going in for the kill

I'm doing it for a thrill

Oh I'm hoping you'll understand

And not let go of my hand-

Feeling for himself it wasn't an illusion, he threw himself into the older red head's arm with as much force as his small body could contain.

Which, Axel noticed, wasn't much, since he was skinny and rather short to begin with. But he should have weighed a little more. Usually when he wanted, the boy could knock him over with the force of his tackle hugs.

"Roxas...." was all he said, but the boy looked up at him with the saddest blue eyes he had ever seen.

"Welcome home." was all the small boy said, then managed to close his eyes and slump over in Axel's arms.

"Roxas?!" Axel yelled, and shook the smaller, hoping to get a response. None. Trying again still produced no results, so scooping the smaller boy up into his arms, he walked to the infirmary, and let the nurses tend to him. Letting him know if was exhaustion and malnutrition that has the smaller boy in it's unconscious grasp, the nurse left and slid the curtains closed so they could have some privacy, even if one of them was not able to converse. Picking up the smaller boy's hand, Axel sighed as he looked the smaller boy over fully. Seeing the bags under his eyes, and the obvious weight loss and over exhaustion, he could only shake his head sadly as he held the small, cool hand in his own, and waited for Roxas to wake up.

-I'm going in for the kill

I'm doing it for a thrill

Oh I'm hoping you'll understand

And not let go of my hand-

Roxas had recovered, and had asked many times for Axel to tell him where he had gone, but Axel refused each time, not wanting to spoil the younger boy's innocence. Or so he claimed. It was really more for peace of mind, so he didn't have to think about it much himself.

-Let's go to war-

Blood and faces of those he killed with practiced ease haunted him every time he tried to think about the places he had been while he was away. He didn't want to tell his companion that he had been sent to kill and hunt down entire families for the benefit of the organization.

-To make peace-

He had wanted to spare the younger of ever even hearing about anything like it, but he did work for the organization, s it wasn't likely he was going to escape the same future when he came of age to the organization.

He winced when he thought of all the people he had had to kill, all in the name of the organization. Just so that his own future would be secured. He had been ruthless, and had taken no prisoners nor left any survivors on that mission. And Roxas did not need to know what a ruthless and cruel s-o-b he had to be sometimes.

-Let's be cold-

The only thing he had left to obliterate was that keyblade master, Sora, if he remembered correctly. He'd get the assignment soon, he knew. And it was the last one he had ever wanted. But he knew for sure he would get it, as all of his other jobs had called for something similar, and he had performed for his master with a practiced ease of self confidence.

-To create heat-

But all that mattered right now was that he and Roxas had not gotten any assignments and, they were free to sit on the clock tower and eat sea salt ice cream, just like they always had done after a mission together.

"Are you sure you won't tell me?" Roxas turned to meet the gaze of emerald green streaked with a light pale gold around the iris. He didn't say what Axel wouldn't tell, but he already knew.

"No." Was the simple answer, and Roxas should have nodded his head and accepted the answer like he usually did, instead he stood up and tossed his ice cream off the tower.

"You can't hide from it Axel. As much as you want to." the blue eyes pierced through the green until the slightly surprised green eyes slid into their customary smirk, and desperate green implored the hardened blue eyes not to ask, begged him to let it go.

-I hope in darkness

We can see

And you're not blinded by the light from me-

mutely shaking his head Roxas denied Axel's silent plea to drop it.

Shoulders dropping, Axel sighed and closed his eyes. And words came out of his mouth Roxas wanted to shirk at in horror.

The story of Axel's mission was finally out, and Axel felt in some small way relieved. But he knew he would lose Roxas as a friend, or as anything more they had at all, because of the things he had done, had HAD to do. The blood, the tears, crying, and a lot of scared and angry people had been mown down on his lat mission. And now Roxas knew about it all. The most hated part of himself he wanted to hide away or squash out of existence.

But. Instead of shirking back in horror, and leaving like Axel expected, he held out an earbud for him to place in his ear. Quirking his head, Axel almost asked but Roxas beat him to it.

"Listen." Was his only word. And listen Axel did.

-I'm going in for the kill

I'm doing it for a thrill

Oh I'm hoping you'll understand

And not let go of my hand-

-end-

so, what did you guys think? I really hope you liked it, as I had SO many directions for the story to go in. I was going to make Roxas insane at first, and then I decided not to.....since that would take the more complicated route to getting to where I wanted the story to go. I didn't want it to end like that, but there is fluff, I guess if you squint a little. Anyways, I really hope it was long enough for you guys, and that you enjoyed. ^^ I always enjoy reviews, though I don't pressure you to leave one. If you do, great! If not, then boo, but I'll live. It's just here for your enjoyment, so enjoy! : D


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